My new lighting setup arrived today, and with it, some changes took place.

First off, it’s really crazy how much changed with one “big ass light,” along with an effective soft box. It looks so professional, especially when paired with the LED lights on the floor for some depth in the shot.

With the ZV-1’s badass colour science so it picks up more accurate colours from reality unlike the greens and oranges my iPhone X frequently picked up with my iPhone, so the light grey wall looks a lot more white and can work well the LED in a camera gear YouTube-esque vibe.

I also got rid of my bookshelves in the shot because it didn’t look right anymore. It was too chaotic for colour and I wanted a more minimalistic look.

The shot is looking pretty good so far, but it’s super cramped for room — to the point where I might move my bookshelves out of my room.

The output is worth it though. And to know I’ll have a double angle soon, plus a new tripod, and a possible boom mic setup? This setup is going to be sick. I’m pleased.

But that’s it, I’m just pleased. This isn’t making me any happier than I was last week. I pulled a great mistake in thinking I’d be any more happy than I was prior to all of this gear. The reality is, no amount of gear or external, material possessions will ever make me happy.

Sure, I might get a 24h high like I did with the first camera. But after that? It becomes the normal. The Lamborghini, the mansion — they’re no different.

I’m incredibly grateful that I have the depth of perspective to see that these smaller things are no different. They are a pattern and a preview of what’s to come with the future, bigger accomplishments down the road. They’re pleasurable as hell for a very short period of time, but then you return to whatever your default is — your normal level of consciousness, emotional well being, and happiness.

So far, only a week into having some new gear for my content creation aspirations and though I am grateful for my upgrade in quality and ability to tell stories even more effectively, I am no happier. I know conceptually that I shouldn’t wait to be happy but it’s a reminder that there is nothing in this world I should wait for to feel anything less than incredible.

I wish I could go back in time and tell myself to enjoy the journey to getting here more. This camera setup — like almost everything else — wasn’t worth stressing over.

Here’s what I would tell Josh about a year ago: Enjoy this journey. Don’t worry so much about each penny. Max out exactly what you can do with that iPhone. Have more fun with that content catch-up. Smile more. Laugh more. Right now is enough. You’re going to be okay. You’re safe. Don’t worry what people think of this. What matters is what you think of this is. You’ve got this. Everything’s working out perfectly. Keep going, and enjoy every moment as best as possible.

The journey is always better than the destination, but since I’m here in this one regard, I’ll practice gratitude for what I have while practicing loving the other journeys that I’m on.